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Home Alone (Feedback)

Thanks for all your comments. I think we ended up talking more about using children’s reins than anything else, but that’s a really interesting topic as well. By the way, I noticed today that I forgot to update my ALC blog with the new entry. Please remind me next week!

Here is some feedback on your comments. Feel free to ask me questions if I miss something you were not sure about.

You probably mean the incident, a 3-year-old boy has died after falling from the 5th-floor balcony of his home in Aichi.
You can actually use “where” in this sentence: the incident where a 3-year-old boy…

and you would end up living with the guilt and pain for the rest of your life.
Nice.

As YU said, I can’t believe that how she could do that.
“I can’t believe she could do that” or “I can’t understand how she could do that.”

Often mother has to child rearing alone because her husband is too busy at work
Mothers often have to bring up children alone because their husbands are too busy at work.

I think toddlers should not be left alone just for even a little time.
I don’t think that toddlers should be left along even for just a little time. (A-Z: Negative sentence word order)

I hadn’t known about the news of this accident until my husband told me that.
“I hadn’t heard…” or “I didn’t know….” You don’t need “that” on the end of the sentence, either; “told me about it” would sound more natural.

There were heavy thunder and lighting 3 times today in my area.
There was heavy thunder and lightning three times today in my area.

You know what children do is always beyond our expectation.
You know that children always do the unexpected.

Now I am a student and I can’t even imagine having my children!
Now I am a student, and I can’t even imagine having children.

Wow! Now we can see “posting time” !
I had to ask the guy who made the website to add that feature. Thanks for noticing.

Yesterday I found a short letter(notice) from TEPCO in my mailbox. It was written that why they need to raise electricity bill this summer.
It explained why they need to raise…

Actually I even hesitate in taking shower when no one can sit in with my sleeping daughter.
Actually, I even hesitate to take a shower when there is no one to sit with my sleeping daughter.

By the way, did you hear about the horrible news that a naked man ate another naked man’s face on a highway in Miami?
Yes, I did. It was all over the British news as well. There are some very strange people in this world!

My sons have not married yet,
My sons are not married yet,

Your story made me feel scary!
Your story made me feel scared. / Your story scared me.

My daughter is still 8, so I don’t think she is big enough, but I had to leave her alone when I went to a meeting at my son’s junior high school in April.
Excuse my ignorance, but why couldn’t you just say to the school, “Sorry, I can’t come to the meeting because there is no one to look after my daughter?”

I got a notice from my daughters school yesterday, and it says a pervert has been seen in my area. A junior high school girl was flashed on her way home.
Unfortunately, this seems to be extremely common in Japan.

Personally, I don’t agree to leaving children alone in a house or apartment any age of children.
Personally, I don’t agree with leaving children of any age alone in a house or an apartment.

I came to my senses with his word.
His words brought me to my senses.

You’ve got me wrong!! Just because I said I didn’t know what to say, it doesn’t mean that I am not interested in the topic:)
Very nice sentences.

…and all parents have to do the job at least once for their child.
What does “have to” mean? Is it the law!? What happens if you just say, “I’m sorry, I can’t do it because I’m too busy”?

so I had to left my children home.
… so I have do leave my children at home.

That is the goriest story I’ve ever heard.
“Gory” is exactly the right word for this story! Well done!

Sometimes it worked, but other times it made things worse.
Nice sentence.

You can imagine how hard it is to reject your child’s plea as he/she is crying, reaching out for you with their small hands, and saying “ママ~、ママ~.”
I don’t think my mother would have had any problem with that! She would just have told me to shut up!!

That’s it for this week. I’ll be back again with a new topic on Monday. Bye for now.

13 Comments

  1. YU on Friday June 1st, 2012 at 06:39 PM

    Hi David,

    Thank you for your feedback!

    >I think we ended up talking more about using
    children’s reins than anything else, but that’s a really interesting topic as well.

    Indeed!!
    Because that’s a really interesting topic, I’ve decided to discuss it at the next English language club meeting. I found an interesting article(in English) about the tool. There seem to be pros and cons on using children’s reins in foreign coutries too.
    Anyway, thank you, minmin !!

    > …and all parents have to do the job at least once for their child.
    > What does “have to” mean? Is it the law!? What happens if you just say, “I’m sorry, I can’t do it because I’m too busy”?

    Apparently, many of my mama tomo are always very busy with their children’s school/kindergarten meetings. Some of them are board members(PTA役員). I heard that every mother forces “the role” to other mothers at their first meeting when they choose 役員 for the school year, and it creates very bad atmosphere in them.

    I always thought that I would have more free time if my son started going to kindergarten or school, but I was wrong.
    I also heard that those board members do not get paid, even if they work 3~4 times a week. They’re something like “volunteer workers”.
    I’m alreay very nervous about it, when I imagine if I would be chosen as a 役員….

    Anyway, that’s a really weird custom in Japan. Why they don’t get paid?? Other mothers can have more free time and even earn some money if they work at a part-time job…
    Am I too materialistic??

    Have a great weekend, everyone !

    See you !



  2. Tomo on Friday June 1st, 2012 at 06:58 PM

    Hi David,

    Thank you for your feedback. Yes, the discussion about using children’s reins was very interesting!

    >Excuse my ignorance, but why couldn’t you just say to the school, “Sorry, I can’t come to the meeting because there is no one to look after my daughter?”

    Of course, you can say that to PTA本部(not to the school), but if you miss the first meeting in April, you might be chosen as one of the PTA members of any committee, and you might be chosen as the leader/the sub-leader of the team by lot. You need to agree with this if there are no special reasons, so I wanted to be there.

    >What does “have to” mean? Is it the law!? What happens if you just say, “I’m sorry, I can’t do it because I’m too busy”?

    If that could be an excuse, everyone would say that. “I’m busy with work”, “I have a baby”, or even “I’m already one of the PTA members at the elementary school” cannot be an excuse, according to the 本部. I don’t agree with this unkind rules, but I don’t have enough energy or guts to object them. Apparently, each PTA has its own 規約, but of course it’s not the law, so you can just ignore the rules if you want.

    I have to cook dinner.

    Have a great weekend, everyone!

    Tomo

    PS Your mother is strong!



  3. YU on Friday June 1st, 2012 at 07:25 PM

    Hi Tomo,

    PTA world sounds very severe!
    I simply admire you for your management ability, as you’re a member of three different PTAs!!

    > I don’t agree with this unkind rules, but I don’t have enough energy or guts to object them.

    I know what you mean.
    And if you objected them or just ignored the rules, they would probably treat you as “a strange mother”, wouldn’t they!?

    くわばら、くわばら….



  4. Anne on Friday June 1st, 2012 at 09:56 PM

    Hi David,

    Thank you for your feedback!
    >My sons are not married yet,
    >Your story made me feel scared. / Your story scared me.
    —–Oh, I made basic and stupid mistakes! Thank you for your corrections. I didn’t notice these mistakes when I reread my writings,though…

    Hi Fumie,
    How was the movie?
    I’ve been wanting to see that,too.

    Have a lovely weekend,everyone!

    Anne



  5. Fumie on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 06:06 AM

    Hi David,

    Thank you for your feedback.
    >That is the goriest story I’ve ever heard.
    “Gory” is exactly the right word for this story! Well done!
    I’m glad that you praised my sentence but I’m just copied it from BBC article.

    >I don’t think my mother would have had any problem with that! She would just have told me to shut up!!
    Your mother doesn’t budge. That’s an ideal trait as a mother. I wish I were like her.

    Hi Anne,

    I like the movie “The Descendants” very much. It’s a heartwarming story and we can see beautiful scenery of Hawaii which are not just famous tourist spots but ordinary peoples’ houses and where people live. And all the music are relaxing songs sung in Hawaiian.ハワイ語

    Hi Tomo and YU,

    PTA is really demanding. Nowadays most people are working so saying “I’m busy” can’t be excuse. I think PTA should revise its system. PTA supposed to be for children but it takes lots of mother’s time and it’s not good for children.

    Hi everyone,

    Have a lovely weekend!



  6. amo on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 08:53 AM

    Hi David,

    Thanks for your feedback and brought up an interesting topic as well. 
    Hi everyone,
    I am on my way to see my nieces’ sports meet. I am a good aunt(lol) so even if I have to leave home earlier than usual, I will go see them. 

    Have a nice weekend:)
    amo



  7. David Barker on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 10:47 AM

    Hi Tomo,

    I’m not talking about your case specifically, because I don’t know enough about it, but your explanation reminded me of something. When I came to Japan, one of the first things that struck me was that Japanese people seem to spend their whole lives getting pushed around and pressured into doing things that they don’t want to do. I have always connected this with the education system, which as you know, I believe attempts to brainwash students by drilling three golden rules into them: don’t ask questions; don’t complain; do as you are told.

    Many times, I have heard university students say that they want to quit their part-time jobs, but that their boss “won’t let” them. The first time I heard this, I genuinely couldn’t understand what the student was saying. I said, “It’s really easy… Just tell your boss that you quit, and then don’t show up the next day!” Now that I have been here longer, I understand that everyone seems to be under this constant pressure that they “have to” do certain things and “can’t” do other things. From a Western point of view, it all just seems like a kind of group bullying.

    Anyway, the reason I wanted to mention this is that next week’s topic is going to be about an American who was “bullied” by a big company and decided to fight back in his own way. It’s a really interesting story. See you on Monday.



  8. Tomo on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 02:54 PM

    Hi YU,
    >And if you objected them or just ignored the rules, they would probably treat you as “a strange mother”, wouldn’t they!?

    Oh yes, exactly. There are always some parents who ignore the rules completely and never come to any of the meetings or the events, but I have to tell you that it is not a good idea if you want to get along with other mothers. As you know, the number of children is decreasing, and the number of mothers is also decreasing. In my children’s schools, if some mothers(parents) refuse to do the job, other mothers have to do it more than once. Actually, I had to do it twice when my oldest son was in junior high school, so this is my 5th ”yakuin.”

    >I’m alreay very nervous about it, when I imagine if I would be chosen as a 役員….

    Oh, don’t worry about that. It’s not that difficult. It’s just tiring.(笑) Actually, the PTA at my son’s old elementary school had a better system. The 本部 told us, “Please do the job at least once while one of your children in school(1人の子につき1回ではなくて兄弟姉妹が在学中に1回)”, and mothers with babies wouldn’t be chosen as a 役員, so there is the atmosphere of “Let’s help each other.” I hope your son’s school has a reasonable system, too!

    Hi Fumie,
    >I think PTA should revise its system.

    I agree with you 100%!!

    Hi David,
    I can’t disagree with you this time. As for the PTA jobs at my children schools, there are lots of useless, meaningless, and ridiculous things. The system doesn’t fit the situation we are in now. I found it a bit like the political world. It takes ages to change a tiny little part of the rules. Having said that, I think schools and parents should work together for our children, and it’s easier to do it if we have some kind of system. There are always things that you don’t want to do but need to do, or things no one wants to do but someone has to do in reality.

    This year, my friend and I were going to be in the same 委員会, but she couldn’t come to the first meeting because her father-in-law passed away on that morning, so she left it to me. Luckily, we were able to be in the same team(I won “rock-paper-scissors”), but at the meeting for the committee, we had to choose three roles called 三役(委員長・副委員長・書記), and my friend was chosen as the 書記 by lot. No one was against the decision, but I knew my friend would be very busy arranging things for her father-in-law for a while(She is working and has three children, too.), so I told the 本部 that I would do the job instead of her. They said that I didn’t need to do it because everyone knows the rules, but I told them that I would do it anyway. That was the only thing I could do to show my disapproval. I don’t have the guts to fight them…

    Hope you are all having a nice weekend.

    Tomo



  9. YU on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 08:37 PM

    Hi Tomo,

    > In my children’s schools, if some mothers(parents) refuse to do the job, other mothers have to do it more than once. Actually, I had to do it twice when my oldest son was in junior high school, so this is my 5th ”yakuin

    Oh,no !! That’s bad.
    I don’t think the current Japanese PTA systems are nice at all, but I would not refuse the job anyway. And if I were chosen as the 役員, I might suggest many new rules to reform the systems instead. As you might have already guessed, I’m the type of person who speaks my mind clearly and openly….

    > there are lots of useless, meaningless, and ridiculous things.

    Huummmhh…very mysterious…What are they actually??
    Last week I asked one of my mama tomo who has been chosen as the PTA役員 for this school year,
    “You go to school almost every day, are there so many things to do there??”
    “Oh yeah, many….(まあ、ホントに色々あるんだよ、これが…)” she answered and smiled wryly.

    Hi David,

    > their boss “won’t let” them

    Maybe the boss didn’t want him/her to quit the job at least until a next part-timer is found??

    >“It’s really easy… Just tell your boss that you quit, and then don’t show up the next day!”

    I’ve worked at a “Japanese” 回転sushi restaurant as a part-timer when I was a student in Germany.
    There were lots of workers from other countries(here I mean, non-Japanese) at the restaurant. Some of them had a quarrel with their boss or colleagues and never showed up again. The president of the company was a German man, but a Japanese shushi chef was managing the restaurant all by himself, including the employment.
    I can remember that almost every week he ended up revising the employees’ working schedule shifts.
    Actually, he was a friend of mine from German language school. He often complained to me, “How could they quit so easily!? They never consider of other colleagues, this restaurant or me!!”

    I don’t want to use the term “cultual difference” every time, but is this the case again!?
    I’ve heard that “changing jobs” is not a bad thing in Western countries, people believe that is one of the ways to improve your carriers.
    But in Japan, we admire those who reach the age limit and retire.

    I don’t know why the students wanted to quit the jobs, but if they become working members of society, things get severer. I heard more and more new graduates are quitting their jobs within three years nowadays, but apparently, most of them cannot get a better job or in worst case, become jobless after that.

    I’m not talking about Japan is better or vice versa, but this is the reality in today’s Japan.

    See you !



  10. miktak on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 08:45 PM

    Hi David,

    Thank you for your feedback.

    > I think toddlers should not be left alone just for even a little time.
    I don’t think that toddlers should be left along even for just a little time. (A-Z: Negative sentence word order)

    I sometimes make such mistakes as above.
    I’ll be more careful. Thank you.

    I have a son who is the first grade of the elementary school. I didn’t get a role of PTA this year, so I don’t have a troublesome yet.
    I worry that I will get some problems about PTA in the future.

    Have a good weekend.



  11. YU on Saturday June 2nd, 2012 at 09:07 PM

    carrier=> career

    shushi chef =>”sushi” chef

    Sorry !



  12. Yukako on Sunday June 3rd, 2012 at 06:27 PM

    Hello David,

    Thank you for your feedback.

    >Now I am a student, and I can’t even imagine having children.

    Oh, I’ve made common English errors for Japanese learners!
    I read pages 44,45,167 of your book.

    Thank you for your corrections!

    See you.



  13. trmr on Monday June 4th, 2012 at 07:40 AM

    Hi David
    Thank you for your feedbacks.

    Hi Anne
    Yes, the incidents of the hallucinatory herbs is increasing in Japan. It’s horrible!

    It is getting hotter a little by little.
    It’s hot to wear a long sleeve shirt.

    Bye for now

    trmr



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