Noisy Children (Feedback)
Thanks for all your comments. As I expected, it seems that people’s opinions on this topic change when they have kids themselves. No surprise there!
The discussion about the baby strollers was also interesting. In Britain, if a mother is struggling with a baby stroller, I can pretty much guarantee that someone will come to help her. I have done this myself in Japan a few times, but it’s so unusual that at first, the women looked scared because they thought I was going to mug them!
Like Anne and Kattie, I used to live next to a children’s playground, and I also used to love the sound of children playing. I suppose it’s just a question of “time and place.” I have to admit that I get really annoyed at noisy children in onsens. Actually, I suppose it would be more accurate to say that I get angry at the father / grandfather who is with them and does nothing at all to calm them down.
I suppose the most important point, however, is that unless Japan does something to boost the birth rate very soon, the country’s future is going to be very bleak. Of course we need a society that is more tolerant to children and young mothers, but we also need less overtime, more stable jobs, and better childcare facilities. I hope this government will find a way to do these things.
Here is some feedback on your comments.
They are all public places, outside the home are almost public places.
Almost everywhere outside the home is a public place. (A-Z: almost)
I still think that there are places that you shouldn’t bring your children while they don’t know how to behave properly.
I still think that there are places that you shouldn’t bring your children until they know how to behave properly.
I didn’t say that you can bring your children anywhere you like.
I didn’t say that you should be able to bring your children anywhere you like.
I was very much worring about the noise that our kids made, especially at night.
I used to worry a lot about the noise that our kids made, especially at night. (A-Z: used to)
and no matter we told them not to be noisy, they running around.
and even if we tell them not to be noisy, they will still keep running around.
The second son of my friend was diagnosed as autism
The second son of my friend was diagnosed with autism.
I don’t think nothing is wrong with this idea
I don’t think there is anything wrong with this idea
Anyway, it is sure that the society is becoming less torelant of children
Anyway, there is no doubt that society is becoming less tolerant of children.
I have noticed that people who haven’t had children often judge parents harshly and think that if they ever had children they would bring them up differently and their kids would be much better behaved.
Guilty as charged!
I wish we had the pacage like that when I gave birth to my sons.
I wish we had had a package like that when I had my sons. (“Had” is a bit more natural than “gave birth to.”)
I agree, but we should not forget that many of them have mental problems such as phonic tic disorders(音声チック障害), ADHD (Attention Deficit / Hyperactivity Disorder).
Some people doubt whether ADHD is even a real disorder. There is a strong argument that this idea has only been developed so that drugs companies can sell tranquillisers to children. The number of children on medication like this in the US is truly terrifying.
I’m not sure people became intolerant with the noise that kids made or not, but people’s lifestyle have(has?) been changing.
I’m not sure whether people have become more intolerant of the noise that kids make, but people’s lifestyles have changed.
Once you start complaining about the noise that kinds make, and then to whom you are complaining about the noise tomcat makes at night?
to whom are you going to complain about the noise that tomcats make at night?
There seems to have a lot of things to learn from Finland as far as child care and education concerned.
There seem to be a lot of things we can learn from Finland as far as childcare and education are concerned.
Did anyone watch the last night’s soccer game between Japan and Australia?
Did anyone watch last night’s soccer game / the soccer game last night between Japan and Australia?
We finally ended up with leaving there as soon as we finished eating!
We finally ended up leaving as soon as we finished eating!
I can’t agree with you more!
I couldn’t agree with you more!
I have heard about pachinko parlours but I didn’t know about the noise of election cars!
They are a complete pain in the ears! Everyone hates them.
Also, train stations and department stores are shouting to watch your step on rainy days and to be careful not to get your finger caught in the doors. No one needs that!
I think Japan is actually a very noisy country.
My opinion is from my own experience,
This is okay, but you could also say, “My opinion is based on my own experience.”
So, I agree with you that children are not interested in their mothers’ shopping at all, but I wonder mothers have to think childrens’ interests first all the time. Isn’t it a bit harsh?
Can’t they leave the kids with a grandparent or a friend? I think that’s what people do in the UK.
That’s it for today. Have a great weekend, and let me know if you have any questions.
>but it’s so unusual that at first, the women looked scared because they thought I was going to mug them!
(LOL!) Thank you for your feedback. I really wish everyone in Japan (especially men!) were all like you!
By the way, I read in the newspaper yesterday that they’re going to reform the system of the university entrance exams. It sounds like a good step forward, but a bit too late for my sons, though!
Sorry, I didn’t the last “though”!
Thank you for your feedback!
> Some people doubt whether ADHD is even a real disorder.
As far as I know, it seems that children are easily diagnosed with a disorder these days, but I can’t believe that all of them are really sick. I feel that they become sick hearing they are sick from a doctor because their parents and people around those kids get panicked and treat them as if they were really sick.
If I remember correctly, Sir Ken Robinson talked about the girl who was diagnosed with ADHD in his presentation. Everyone handles children gingerly once they have been diagnosed with ADHD. In fact, they look different from other kids, but I suspect they are just unique, not sick.
> Can’t they leave the kids with a grandparent or a friend? I think that’s what people do in the UK.
As I wrote in the later paragraph in the same comment, they can’t and I don’t want. I mentioned the reasons when we discussed “baby sitting” before. Kattie suggested the same thing as you at that time. Some of you might get annoyed, but this is our way of thinking in childcare and I don’t want other people to say anything about this.
By the way, my son doesn’t have grandparents in Japan. All his relatives live in different prefectures or in a different country.
I realize that many of my mom friends have parents or parents in law, but they actually live far away, in different prefectures, too.
> By the way, I read in the newspaper yesterday that they’re going to reform the system of the university entrance exams. It sounds like a good step forward, but a bit too late for my sons, though!
I heard it, too.
I just hope that it isn’t only a performance of the Abe Cabinet to win the election of this summer.
By the way, the government has decided to subsidize half of the kindergarten fees for the second child and all of them for after the third child from next year.
This is the main topic among people around me, it’s nothing with me, though!
My son went on a school excursion to 八景島シーパラダイス today. Parents had to go, too. I payed 7500yen for this trip. There are 27 students in my son’s class and I was a bit surprised to see five fathers today.
To tell the truth, I never want to go again because students stayed together only during they were on the bus and when they took pictures after getting off the bus. The rest of the time is free time(for four hours!) I wonder if it still should be called 遠足. It’s almost the same as family trips.
Have a nice weekend, all!!
Thank you for your feedback as always.
I have a question about the following correction.
>There seems to have a lot of things to learn from Finland as far as child care and education concerned.
There seem to be a lot of things we can learn from Finland as far as childcare and education are concerned.
*as far as child care and education concerned(mine)
*as far as child care and education are concerned
I understand your correction, but I wonder if my sentence is wrong grammatically or not. I meant to say,”…being concerned” ,omitted “being” and then, I wrote ” …as far as child care and education concerned.” Actually I thought which way I should write”concerned” and “are concerned”, but the former one came to mind first, so I chose this.
>I get angry at the father / grandfather who is with them and does nothing at all to calm them down. —- I couldn’t agree with you more. Besides, one thing I feel uncomfortable is parents (or adults) say, “Don’t do that! If you don’t stop, some scary guy will scold you!” I don’t think this is the proper way when adults scold their their child (grandchild).
>Some of you might get annoyed, but this is our way of thinking in childcare and I don’t want other people to say anything about this.—I understand to some extent. My friend’s daughter has two kids and both(her daughter and her husband) are working. My friend sometimes helps her family, so situation is different, but I heard that they found their time in turn. I mean, when her daughter joins 女子会 once a month, her husband takes care of two kids. Actually her daughter doesn’t say anything about 女子会 to my friend(mother) because she knows my friend doesn’t feel good or agree with that idea, but grand children spill the beans what the couple try to keep secret!
Have a lovely weekend, everyone:)
> but grand children spill the beans what the couple try to keep secret!
Hahaha… Kids are always honest!
My husband takes care of my son when I joins 飲み会 once in a while, too. It’s not as often as once a month, though!
I used to go drinking with my friends when I was much younger, but I’m not really interested in going out with my friends at night now, I prefer watching TV at home, so I’m satisfied with my current situation.
Thank you so much for your feedback!
>I used to worry a lot about the noise that our kids made, especially at night. (A-Z: used to)
You corrected my sentences regarding “used to” several times. I’m sorry that I keep on making the same mistake.
>Some people doubt whether ADHD is even a real disorder.~
If it was true, it’s really scary and we can’t forgive them(drugs companies.)
But I still think that ADHD has some typical symptoms and it’s a disorder. For example, my middle son (who was diagnosed with it) sometimes repeating walk back and forth involuntarily like when he brushes his teeth.無意識に行ったり来たりする。
I have a question.
I can’t agree with you more! (mine)
I couldn’t agree with you more! (your correction)
Why it’s wrong to use present tense? I wrote this sentence about kattie’s sentence of
>There are lots of even more annoying things that adults do.> I agree with kattie when I read this sentence. So why do I have to use past tense?
Anne also wrote “I couldn’t agree with you more” in her comment. I looked up in the dictionary and there are “I can’t agree with you more.” so present sentence is also accetable, I think.
Have a nice weekend, everyone!
Regarding your question about the expression “I couldn’t/can’t agree with you more!”, please take a look at David’s feedback for the older entry “Corporal Punishment.”
I made the same mistake, and he said that “I can’t…” was not wrong, but “I couldn’t…” was more commonly used. I guess it’s just a fixed expression.
Yesterday, I tried “zazen（座禅)” for the first time in my life. Although I worried a lot that my legs might become numb, I was okay, and actually it was very nice to just sit straight and concentrate on your breathing for 30 minutes. I kind of understand that not a few people meditate every day.
Hi David and everyone,
What a pity!! I I wasn’t able to write a comment on the topic. I was a bit busy so that I was already tired at night. Anyway, my thoughts about it is almost the same as Biwa, so it’s ok. I watched a tv program featured this topic and strollers last December. I was surprised to know that some people became sick due to noise of nursery schools.
I am on my way to work and I am off the train. Bye for now.
Have a nice day:)
「couldn’t + 比較級」の表現は、知らないと本当に誤解してしまいますよね。 実は前にcan’t agree more と couldn’t agree more についてDavidに質問したことがあるんです。 この表現に can’t はダメだという解説をどこかで読んだのですが、can’t の例も見たことがあったので。。 それでDavidに聞いてみたのですが、現在の話でも couldn’t が正しいとのことでした。「もし、しようとしたとしてもできない」という意味だからだそうです。 一種の仮定法なのかな、というのが私の理解ですが、難しいのでこれ以上は考えないことにしました（笑）
See you soon,
「couldn’t + 比較級」の代表的な例として他にも「I couldn’t care less」というのがあります。これは「気にする程度がこれ以下になることはないだろう」＝「全く気にしない」という意味になります。
You might feel differently if you bacame a parent in the future.
Tomoの理解が正しいとすると、I couldn’t agree with you more. は長く書くと
“Even if I tried to agree with you more, I couldn’t agree with you more.”
Hi Biwa and YU,
Thank you so much for helping me with my question.
All your comments helps me a lot. I understand I should use “I couldn’t agree with you more.” even when I say the present situation because it’s a fixed expression and the subjunctive. What I admire you both is you remember what you learned in this blog and find the one that explained about that matter. I wonder how you organize all you learned.
Biwa, YU ありがとう！説明のおかげで理解できました。私の方が長くこのブログに参加させてもらってるのに、私はすぐに忘れてばかりで恥ずかしいです。お二人がすごいなと思うのは、学んだことをよく覚えてるし、覚えたらすぐに使ってる。（これって大事だと思います）それと質問の説明がいつのコメントにあったか見つけて貼り付けてくれてますが、膨大な量の過去のブログをどのように管理してるんですか？
>Anyway, my thoughts about it is almost the same as Biwa, so it’s ok.
Glad to know that I’m not a weirdo! (^^)b
Hi Fumie and YU,
I’m not a good organizer at all, it just sticked on my mind because I think it’s a very English-like expression. And thanks YU, Tomo’s explanation was helpful for me, too!
Sorry, “stick in my mind” is correct.(lol!)
Sorry again! “Stuck in my mind”!
(I’m sure this will, too!)
過去のコメントを探したい時は「BTB Press – スペース – OOOO（探したい表現）」など、色々検索ワードを変えて検索してみているだけです。
Thanks everyone for helping Fumie with her question.
I’m afraid that sentence is grammatically wrong unless you have “are.”